“I wasn’t a native in the land of the literal minded, but I enjoyed my time there.”
Michelle McNamara, I’ll be Gone in the Dark
Last year (Um, I guess two years ago…), I summed up 2017 in facebook statuses. I received several requests to dust off this old blog, and do it again. Thus, I combed through my newsfeed and picked a few of my favorites. Nevermind it’s 2019 already, here is 2018 summed up in 15 Facebook statuses.
- Research is important.
For example, if I had done my research, I would have known the show I just finished watching never got renewed for a third season. Instead, the show ended with a marriage in shambles, a suicide, and Britain about to go to war with Germany.
2. Student emailing me because he was absent: Hi Shannon
Me: Hi Timothy
(His name isn’t Timothy… but hey my name isn’t Shannon)
3. Me: I don’t know how I’m gonna finish everything I need to finish.
Tom: You won’t.
4. Me: Graduated magna cum laude from an Ivy League school, with degrees in literature and linguistics.
Also me: Can’t figure out idioms and says things like “He spilled the dirty laundry”
5. Cashier: Wow, are you a mom? Looks like your kids must really be wearing you out.
Me: Um…no. I’m just a grad student….
6. Started listening to an audiobook about the importance of sleep, and based on its recommendations, I should just give up grad school.
7. 4 yr old nephew randomly asks me: Hey tía, do you need to go to the bathroom?
Me: *Visibly confused* Um… no.
Nephew: What?! You guys ask me that.
8. Honestly, one of the hardest things about being Mexican is introducing your non-Mexican friends to Mexican candy, the pride and joy of your childhood, and them going “Ugh.. Blehhh why is this spicy?” 🙁💔
9. “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a linguist in possession of a good phonology/phonetics paper, must be in want of sounding out all the IPA transcriptions.” -Pride & Phonemes
10. Me: I could really go for a nap right now, but I can’t.
Tom: Yeah, instead you have to work for the next 75 years.
11. This Halloween, I scared my students by showing them how many tabs I have open on my computer.
12. I had to shoo a pigeon out of my apartment this morning and I don’t think I’m ever gonna get over it.
13. My apartment smells wonderfully like turkey… Of course, this is because I’m getting wafts of someone else’s thanksgiving dinner through the air vents.
14. Me in high school: 5 pages?! That’s so long.
Me freshman year of college: A 10 page essay! That’s crazy!
Me senior year of college: Oh cool, a 10 page essay, no biggie.
Me in grad school, at this very moment: On page 18 of my 15 page paper*… and still not done…
*syllabus states approximately 15 pages.
15. Woke up with the Baby Shark song stuck in my head.
I don’t have kids.
This wasn’t part of the deal.
For all three of you who still sometimes read this blog, I wish you the best in this new year. May it be filled with many wonderful small moments, and a couple big ones just for kicks.
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